I don't know why but I mentally prepared myself for delivering these babies sometime before week 37. Now that it hasn't happened, I've been having a tough time adjusting to the situation. Sometimes it feels like I'm just sitting around, with life on hold, until this major event takes place. But the fact is I already have a lot of life in front of me. I really want to participate in it and enjoy these moments with Evy and Levi, but with almost zero sleep and little mobility, I find myself in this sleepy haze of being half Mick and half gestating machine. A machine that gives most of its energy to supporting two life sources that are getting bigger each day.
The good thing is that I have the perspective of my other kids' births. I know this is temporary. As this pregnancy has progressed, I've thanked the Lord many times for how I've been seasoned for this role of mama to four. If you know my road to having babies, you know that my first pregnancy was a set of monoamniotic twins. They didn't make it past 8 weeks, which was the hardest thing I've had to face yet in life. But His plans are greater than mine, and I honestly believe twins for my first round would have taken me down a dark path.
I was a bit of a hot mess with Evy (ok, a lot of a hot mess). I didn't have that veteran mom ability to know everything comes in phases. She wasn't going to scream at me forever and sickness comes and goes. Because of the experience with my first two, I know I will be out of this sleepy haze eventually, probably after the first two years of the twins' lives, but eventually, which is good to know.
The trick is finding life in the wait, even if it's a sedentary form of it, until delivery day comes.
While I'm confined, I get to live vicariously through my husband who is an adventure loving daddy. He sent me these pictures of the kiddos on a recent hike that they took near our home.
My mom took the pictures below this past weekend. I did not think I would make it to Mark's first ever office Christmas party, but there I was in my sitting and waiting mode, so I figured, why not? He's waited a long time to be part of an event like this and I wanted to be by his side if at all possible. Plus, since I'm full term at 37 weeks, I'm physically up for doing a bit more because I think it might push me into labor.
So, I got dressed up, Grandma and Grandpa took the kids, and we left for an hour or so on the town. Honestly, I was kind of hoping my water would break. I don't care where it happens anymore, even if it means I'm that spectacle that everyone in the office talks about with a disgusted look on their face. But sadly enough, I went home without causing any drama at my husband's work party.
It was fun to get out though and see the reactions I got when I turned to the side.
Here's our photo booth shot from the party. We put the naughty sign pointing toward Baby B because this little man is causing me some serious discomfort. The ultrasound lady said he is weighing in at a whopping 8.2 lbs! For a twin, that's huge, especially since that was a week ago. We don't know how accurate the ultrasound is, but it's a given that I'll be having two boys on the big side. Mark weighed in at 11 lbs when he was born (poor ReJean!!) and Levi was 9.7 (which seemed small after knowing Mark's size), so we'll see how these boys turn out. Baby A came in around 7 lbs so he got the "nice" arrow (even thought that's kinda big too).